Tuesday 8 June 2010

A.M.... 08/06/2010

When something affects us constantly, more often than not, we develop an immunity towards it. Gentlefolk, I have developed an immunity to something which in my line of work, can be a disaster. I have developed an immunity to my alarm.
It simply doesn't do it for me anymore. Like most of you, I make use of the alarm on my mobile, and the people who make mobile phones have tried to make them as user friendly as possible, thus the alarm tune on mine is rather pleasing to the ears.
How the hell this is supposed to wake me up is beyond me. The alarm went off this morning, and I started doing a lil' 1,2 step in my dreams. It was so awesome. The beat and melody. Timbaland and Dr Dre would have been impressed. I appreciate the attempt by Samsung in trying to calmly and soothingly raise me from my slumber, but they've got the wrong approach.
When one has a job like mine, and goes through what I do everyday, one does not need to be woken up calmly... One needs the equivalent of a military drill sergeant as an alarm.
The alarm tone on my phone would be more suited for waking me up after a night of doing the horizontal gymnastics with a nymphomaniac... Maybe the night after a serious drinking binge, with its resulting hangover...possibly on a morning where the most tasking activity I have to complete is the scratching of my balls...
But on a work morning? What I need on days like this is an ear piercing scream, I need Wande Coal doing that high pitched squeal of his, I need something to make me jump up, and get ready for another shit day at the office.
If you look at it, its better that way. Because now, you're not going to get your hopes up on how your day is going to go. If you wake up with that soothing serenade, you might get delusional and start thinking "ah well, who knows, today might be a good day after all." Then you get to the office, all smiling and serene, and then get hit with the usual pile of bullshit.
But if you wake up pissed off already, its like "fuck it, shit can't get any worse than this." Go to the office with that in mind, and its easier to get through the day. With everything in life, this may have disadvantages, such as smacking your idiot boss and incompetent colleagues, but let's face it, they deserve it dammit.
I gotta go now, I'm late for a unit meeting. Basically 30 minutes of my boss telling us what we did wrong last week and how his ass is extremely hygenic and we should all be priviledged to kiss it.
My name is Womilee people, see you later.

No comments:

Post a Comment